You run into the next room and swipe open his phone, hurrying to try to find out what you desperately need to know, before he comes back. It takes less than a minute to confirm what your intuition knew instantly. There is someone else.
A wave of insecurity, helplessness, panic, and blind rage hits you. You think of the life you've built together, brick by brick, all washed away by eight little words. You wonder who to kill first, her or him. Then you think of your children, and now you realize that you actually are going to throw up, because if he isn't here for you anymore, how will you ever manage? Doesn't he know how important he is, to all of you? How much everyone loves him? How much you love him? How could he do this? How could he do this to you?
You still can't understand what happened. You love your family - they're the reason you're alive. Caring for them is your greatest accomplishment. You're a good person, and a good man. You know you are. How could you do this?
You suppose it crept up on you somehow. At first it was just a flirtation, some back and forth banter you thoroughly enjoyed. It seemed harmless enough. You've never been one to sit around and think about what's going on inside you, so you didn't really notice how you started seeking out her company more and more, or when you started talking to her about the less-than-stellar parts of your relationship with your wife. You didn't notice how she seemed to reach out to you, promising to give you everything you needed...everything you weren't getting at home. You can't blame it on her, though - after all, you reached back. Maybe she was lonely, too.
It hurts to think about all of this now. You realize that you stopped feeling important to your wife a long time ago, after the kids started coming, and her focus seemed to shift from you to them. You realize that you never told her when loneliness stopped being something to tolerate until you could see her again, and instead became your relentless, everyday existence. You think about all the times you desperately wanted to hold your wife and didn't even try, because you knew how tired she was. For the first time it hits you that she might not have even known that anything was wrong. Confused and full of shame, you drop your head into your hands.